Crap

Again, swimming up towards the light.  Trying to anyway.

Not happy to be back at work.  Not one little bit.  I don't even feel like I had any vacation time.  Too many things going on that kept me from any form of relaxation.  No worries though, soon enough I will have vacation time.  Lots of it.  There is a light at the end of the tunnel.

At least thats what I keep telling myself.

So incredibly depressed.

I have a good friend that I email with pretty much every day.  She is one of the ones that we go to horse shows and stuff with.  Her work email has a filter that will delete any message sent through it with any foul language or anything like that in it.  Man does that keep me behaving.  Pisses me the hell off many times, but keeps me in line.  Funny thing is, when you talk about horses, there are many terms that the thing sees as sexual but aren't, so that part of it is pretty dang funny.

When I did the modification on my mortgage, they raised the monthly payment instead of lowering it.  They also didn't remove the late fees and bogus 'inspection fees' from it.  So I fought them over it for months, finally I made a repayment agreement with them to pay an even HIGHER monthly payment to just pay the fucking late fees/inspection fees off and stop fighting them.  Well.  For a couple of months I didn't have the extra 600.00 to add to the already 1200.00 a month mortgage payment, so I didn't add it.  The first day of my forced vacation, I received a letter from lawyers saying that I am in default and they are auctioning off my house the first week of August unless I pay the entire loan off.  That really started my vacation off right.  Hence the depression.  I'm just so fucking sick of working my ass off and fighting the whole mess.  I really am.

I guess I'll call the bastards at the mortgage company on my lunch break today and see if I can work anything out with them.  FYI, never use American Home Mortgage for anything in this world, EVER.  They have sucked balls since the very first payment we made on the house six years ago, or whenever this hell started.  They lost my FIRST house payment.  The very first one.  Thank God I was smart enough to send it with a return receipt request on it, so I had proof of when they received it (two weeks before the due date) when they called and accused me of not paying it at all.  It's been a nightmare ever since.  Bastards.

Papoose #1 showed up at the house last night around midnight or so.  Evidently, big plans were made for she and her boyfriend to double date with Papoose #2 and her boyfriend to hit Hurrican Harbor today.  News to me.  I hope they have fun and I hope they are safe.  Crap, I hope they remembered the sunscreen.

I'm glad a bunch if this medical/surgical stuff is done so that I can stop taking the meds they have had me on that have puffed me up like a freaking puffer fish.  I saw pics of myself on FaceBook and I don't even look like me, I'm so bloated.  Disgusting.  Absolutely disgusting.  Hoping to get back to my normal self over the next couple of months.  Bleh.

I totally forgot that the kid and I were supposed to go to the farm this weekend and help my friend move grain and hay.  Just now remembered that.  No wonder she's not speaking to me today.  Great. That's fabulous.

Ok. Gotta get back to work.  Have a great day everyone.