Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Mental Snapshots

I may be a bitch and oftentimes obtuse, but this is a perfect example of the type of thing that I DO get right.  This is the type of thing I would be all over enjoying, and I'm so grateful every day that I've learned how to slow down or stop and enjoy the little things.

Other things I've learned to really truly appreciate in the past couple of years:

-The sound of my children sitting around the dining room table with their friends, their easy conversations, their laughter.

-The way the sunlight looks through the trees in my backyard as I'm standing at the sink preparing dinner or putting water in the coffee pot.

-The fact that every day I roll out of bed and put my feet on the floor, I know my legs will carry me wherever I want to go, if I will just point the way.

-The kindness of strangers, the smallest friendly word or gesture.

-The fact that God gave me the two most amazing kids I could have ever asked for.

-The way it feels when someone I love hugs me, or touches my arm.

-The realization that I really CAN just walk away from someone or something that is making me sad or hurting me in any way.

I actually physically stop and take time to really feel how these and other things make me feel.  I make it a point to take a mental snap shot of it to relive later on when I need it.

I spent way too many years being miserable and taking so many things for granted.  We'll go camping in the fall, it's too hot now or we don't have the money to do this or that now, we'll do it later......

Sometimes there is no 'later'.   I may be late to the party, but dammit, I'm doing my best to make up for lost time and be the person I always wanted to be, the mother I wished I was, the friend I knew I should be.

I am trying.  I am trying.


  1. I need to work on more gratitude in my life. Good post.

  2. I love your mind & heart. And what a beautiful thought....not obtuse at all. Bittersweet experiment. When we were off on our RV trip this summer, we passed a man playing in the SF train station. My sensitive Boy stopped, smiled and begged me to give him some money. I did....he put it into the man's guitar case and thanked him for playing. The entire moment choked me up and once again I was so touched by that Boy's heart.

    Small moments of simple beauty are what it IS about....I'm convinced. You're very brave. You're making it happen for you....=)


  3. your post took my breath away. So perfect, so human. SO wonderful to be able to look in the mirror, despite wll the shit and debris falling around our lives and see what really, really matters shining from your face, seeing the heart of you staring back.