Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Murder, A Stinky Jalopy & A Cross

Tangled Cross!!!!
Lookie what was waiting for me in my mailbox when I got home yesterday!!!!!   My GotYoBackGirlfriend created this cross for me.  Aren't I spoiled????   She did an amazing job!!!!  I will try to get better pics of the details on it later when there is some natural light coming in the office.  Thank you friend!!!!!!!!

So last night after taking some vitamin and mineral supplements to The Real Deal and visiting for a little bit, it was time to go pick Papoose #2 up from her friends house.  On the way down 730 towards town there was too much traffic to be able to use my high beams.  I really like my high beams, since it's a little hard for me to see at night anymore.  But I will not use them when any other cars are around, I'm not that rude.  Anyhow, I'm rolling along and out pops Mister Skunk about 10 feet in front of the jalopy.  He was heading towards the shoulder but was still crossing my lane, so the only option I had to miss him was to swerve into the other lane, where a huge work truck was heading my way.  I chose the skunk option over the head on collision option.  The jalopy sits very low to the ground.  Mister Skunk hit the front spoiler and bounced all the way back under the car to the back.  I was horrified.  I've never hit an animal while driving before.  I've had animals hit by someone else when I was a passenger, and had a deer jump INTO the passenger window of a pickup I was the passenger in, but this was the first time the blood was on my hands, so to speak.

Not even three minutes later, a huge full grown armadillo is in the middle of my lane.  Again, only had the low beams going and saw him too late.  Mister Armadillo met his untimely demise at my hand.  I mean, who kills TWO innocent little creatures in the span of three minutes?????????  I was totally mortified.  And in case any of you have never hit a full grown armor plated armadillo with a car that sits a few inches off the ground, it's not pretty.  Not for Mister Armadillo OR the jalopy  :-(   Suffice it to say, that Mister Armadillo was in NO shape to lay a beer bottle on for a photo op.

Not to mention the inside wheel well of the jalopy is torn loose and the car is making some kind of odd squeaking sound now when it's running.  Oh, and let's not even get into how obnoxious the jalopy smells now.

I'm a murderer.   First Peanut, now these poor little things.

I totally need therapy.

At this point, I'm lucky I can touch my new cross without a burning sensation.  Oy.


  1. i'm so happy you like your cross! whew! sorry i forgot the tassel... it's supposed to be hanging off that little peg thing at the bottom... oh well... i'll send you the tassel and you can tie it on there :)

    i hate hitting little animals... and big ones too... and skunks are the worst! to get rid of the smell you should mix some dish washing soap, baking soda and hydrogen peroxide... wipe down the inside & outside of the car... then soak the rag, wring it out, and twirl it around the inside of the car... it will bind with the odoriferous molecules and make it better

    did you know armadillos can jump straight up in the air.. something like 6 feet high... one time at band camp... oh wait... one time in school a friend of mine straddled a live armadillo on the roadway ... it jumped straight up and put a big arse hole in the oil pan....

    that cross is totally extra special blessed... no burning or lightening strikes....

  2. Mrs. Jarhead hit two birds in two different vehicles on a single out-of-town trip once.

    Birds are hard to hit, BTW.

    On an unrelated note: glad to see your sense of humor is slowly creeping back in to your posts.

  3. The cross is so cool. Yes, we need a brighter picture.
    Poor wittle skunky, poor wittle murderer!