Head Games

Papoose #2 is a HUGE Hunger Games fan.  She's been reading the books ravenously since they came out.  I have read the first one and loved it.  There is going to be a fan fest for Hunger Games fans with meet and greet of the cast at the Galleria in Dallas on March 8th.  I will be taking my girl there.  I'm sure it will be a beating, but it will be so worth it.  She was thrilled when I told her about it this morning.  Makes a moms heart happy to bring that kind of joy to a childs voice  :-)

We are also getting a group of people together to go see the opening night of the movie, I think.  That's still developing though.

So, I've been perfectly civil to Mister Wonderful, and he to me, for days now.  Then boom, last night in comes a torrent of shitty negative texts from him, literally out of the blue.  Talking about things all the way back over 20 years ago.

But also reiterating that he does not feel any guilt whatsoever about hooking up with and supposedly falling in love with Molly The Cunt.  Madly in love.  Planning on happily ever after together.

Astounding.  What am I missing here?

I do believe that I only have a half dozen payments or so left on the jalopy.   Good times!!!

The Real Deal wants me to move in with him.  This is something I have dreamed of for years.  I was shocked at my reaction inside, when he actually said it yesterday though.  I was surprised to realize that, with as incredibly bad as I am at being alone, I am not quite ready to give up my own space just yet.  This realization took me off guard.  Never in a million years would I ever expect to feel that way.  I've really got foggy brain going on.  No telling what I'll do next, I don't even know me anymore.

So, for now, I'm keeping my own place.  Besides, Papoose #2 has decided in no uncertain terms that when and if Mister Wonderful brings The Cunt here to live with him, she is NOT living with them.  I can't say as I blame her.  I will always have a place for my Papooses to lay their weary heads.  Always.

How he can think he is in love with that backstabbing piece of shit of a human being is beyond me.  The all consuming attraction of the taboo, I suppose.

MW had scheduled another realtor to meet us at the tepee at 11:30 this morning.  I was game to take lunch early and drive out there for him, until those nasty undeserved texts started rolling in last night.  Now, I figure he can just handle all that on his own.  I've finally come to a point where I am strong enough to refuse being treated badly for no reason.  And there was NO reason for the tirade last night.  I've been nothing but pleasant to him.

I pray for him every day, that his journey ends in happiness inside.  He refuses to admit that he feels any guilt or remorse for anything that has gone on, but he HAS to be dealing with a shit ton of it mentally, whether he admits it or not.  The conscience is an unforgiving beast.  I hurt for him, behaving like he has, and continues to do.

I intend to keep being the good person that I've been working so hard to be.  I get better and better every day, and I refuse to let him make me feel bad about myself ever again.  Hate yourself all you want, brother, but keep that cancer away from me thankyouverymuch.

Oh, and gotta send a shout out to my most unwelcome but ever diligent readers:

-HI MOLLY.  FUCK YOU YOU WHORE.
-HI SHARON, YES YOUR PRECIOUS NIECE REALLY DID DO THESE HORRIFIC THINGS AND  PLANS TO CONTINUE PERPETUATING THE BETRAYAL INDEFINITELY
-HI CARROLL, STILL LETTING THE CUNT PLAY YOU AND LIE TO YOU TOO?? IDIOT.
-HI MISTER WONDERFUL, YOU CONTINUE TO AMAZE ME WITH THE DEPTH OF HATE  YOU CAN BRING JUST TO HURT ME

Deep breaths.  Just keep being the good person I'm working on being, and everything will be fine in the end.

Today, I choose happiness.

Peace, all.